Too long, I'd say.
I don't typically like or write wordy posts.
But it couldn't be short.
Don't read it
or at the very least,
consider yourself warned.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
The business of mothering children, having a home, and being a man's partner in life are things I've always wanted. It's what I saw my own mother do, and it's something that was always respected and valued by my Dad as well as my community of friends and influences.
Within the three generations I have observed (my own included), there seems to be an increasing resistance to the fundamentals that make a home and family what it is intended to be. There are subtle pulls that if not appropriately resisted, will undermine your home in the quietest, most obscure, unobtrusive way imaginable.
My grandmother, born in 1909, married young, and eventually had five children.
Money was never in excess but they never went hungry.
They had one car between them.
She sewed clothes for her children.
She cooked three meals a day.
My Dad's childhood was simple.
Ma was the quintessential home maker.
My own mother also devoted herself to us, to Daddy, and to keeping things in the home running smoothly.
She did laundry, dusted base boards, planted flowers, made us toast in the the mornings, prepared supper at night, and a myriad of other things.
We spent most of our elementary years in the local public school and our newly formed church school. Before middle school, they made the then radical decision to home school us.
We had lots of friends and were very active in our youth group and other church activities.
We did not, however, run ourselves ragged being overly involved in things that were time consuming on an individual basis. My brother played baseball only in the spring, and my sisters and I did occasional things. I don't recall every having a school party outside of school hours. As a child, the only large group parties I remember were ones that were centered around my parents' Sunday school class or family reunion type get togethers.
We had family game night every Friday night that was followed by a cherished opportunity to sleep on Mom and Dad's floor in our sleeping bags. We giggled as we listened to Daddy tell stories from his childhood or from his stint in the Marine Corp.
Saturday mornings were always started before 9:00 with a couple hours of yard work or household chores.
Television was extremely limited.
Every single morning and every single night we had family "sharing time" as we called it. It was Bible reading, "how was your day", praying together, and simply the way we started and and ended every day. It was all I ever knew.
I've purposed in my heart to do my best to carry the torch my mother passed down to me. I have undoubtedly fallen short in
So here I find myself, in 2015 searching for, praying about what my focus for the year needs to be.
I've recently struggled with thoughts like these:
My kids are mostly shaped and formed….hope I've done a good enough job.
Maybe I can relax a bit.
Whatever will be will be.
I need to be OUT doing something that really matters. I mean, yes, I know, mothering matters, blah blah, but you know, seriously, I need to be out ministering to somebody who is really bad off.
Man, I'm tired.
But! (Here's the good part)
Over the last few months, God has been stirring something in my heart and it's all coming to a head with a book I've "stumbled" across.
Years and years ago, a model woman, my former pastor's wife, said to me,
"Stacey, raise your kids in God's presence."
She later taught on Samuel's upbringing and how he was reared with Eli…
ultimately, IN GOD'S PRESENCE.
Outside my own Mother's influence, that one statement Cathy made to me, has been the single, greatest influence on the way I mother my kids.
I think about it every week.
It makes me say,
"Well Reese, let's stop and pray about that right now"
"Jake, I am SO sorry I got irritated about that. I was wrong"
"Avery, God wants you to choose truth and think about this from His perspective."
You can't fake God's presence.
To be in God's presence, you have to actually abide in Him.
Prayer has to be like breathing.
You have to have ears to hear him speak when you are in the bathroom or driving to school.
You have to want Him more than anything else.
So, weeks ago, when I woke up in the middle of the night, I started praying for God to capture the hearts' of my kids. I've been praying it ever since.
I've got a friend texting me at 5:45 in the morning. I need accountability to get my rear out of bed just a little before my day starts so I can spend some time reading and praying with no distractions. She and I are lovers of the 9 minute snooze button, but together, we are pretty likely to get up.
I love having this help.
This book, I'm only three chapters in but I have more underlined than you would believe.
It has articulated the very things God has been laying on my heart for years.
Like I told the gal who turned me on to it…
It's a heart book, not a formula book….and that's my kind of book.
My kids may not "turn out right" but by God's grace, I'll never quit doing my part.
So far, some of my favorite bits are:
"Kindgom parenting isn't perfect parenting. Kingdom parenting is purposeful parenting."
"At the dinner table, I learned how to live by truth in a world full of lies."
"The reason why so many of our children are not living out their destinies as adults is that they have been raised with the mindset that is too tied to the culture. It is also to 'me centered'."
Our parenting will not all look the same.
It's not so much about whether you work in or away from the home, whether your kids go to public or private school, if you bottle fed or breast fed, if your kids have cel phones when they are 10 versus 14.
It's about are YOU, mom and dad, assuming the responsibility of training your kids to know God's Word and to view the world from His perspective.
How many Christian parents get sucked in the river of cultural normalcy?
Do you question why you do things?
Do you question why you do or do not allow your kids to do certain things?
Don't be afraid to be counter culture.
Are you lazy?
Have you subconsciously thrown in the towel?
These are things I'm examining in my own life and home.
As a result of what God's been putting His finger on in my heart, and as a result of the things He has highlighted in just the first three chapters of this book, (that you ALL should read)
my word/focus for the year is
~stay on the nest~
I won't quit and I won't delegate my kid's knowledge of God to someone else.
I'm taking inventory of my kid's schedules, my busy surgeon husband's schedule, and am being intentional about carving out more consistent time to teach my kids about the God I love.
We have a gymnast, we live in a neighborhood, and my husband has a busy occupation, so there will have to be some work and tweaking to create more learning/teaching space in our lifestyle, but there is no excuse for not adequately discipling my kids and teaching them enough about God's love so that they want to in turn share that love with people around them.
So yes, I will
stay on the nest.
~stacey
No comments:
Post a Comment