~In tHe goOd OLd suMmER TimE~

can you feel it?
can you sense my giddy disposition?
can you see the smiles and hear the laugher?

consider yourself warned. i'm about to gloat and i have no shame.

t.o.m.o.r.r.o.w.i.s.o.u.r.l.a.s.t.d.a.y.o.f.s.c.h.o.o.l.

we can barely contain ourselves over here.

it's about time. 
we barely made it. 
comin' in on a wing and a prayer.

summer is never a moment too soon.

i'm not one who hyper schedules the summer.

we like our pajama days and late movie nights.

occasional afternoon naps are heavenly.

chasing lightening bugs is the best thing ever.

i get time to rediscover my kids without harping on perimeter, past perfect tense, the cardiovascular system, or "seriously? do you still not know the difference between  they're, there, and their?" 

it's a blessed break from the rat race that I treasure more and more every year. 

~stacey

~Mother's Day~

This is something I wrote and posted four years ago but I simply can't say it any better.

So here it is again.
Just for my Mom……I think you should all know her~

Tuesday, May 18, 2010

~Some Mothers You Should Know~Part 2~

Tuesday, May 18, 2010

Some Mothers You Should Know. Part 2~ It's nights like these, the ones where I'm so spent my body actually hurts that I think of my Mother. It's been a couple weeks of countless events and activities centered around the kids. End of the school year awards, programs, parties and sporting events. Those things I couldn't stand to miss because they are opportunities to show my kids they are special to me. Jake's little face in the crowd of other students or Reese's  expression when she finds me in the sea of parents is priceless. Several years ago, I had an epiphany. I was mother to three very young children. Nearly every breath and motion of my body was to meet some need of one or more of them. I was suddenly struck with a new appreciation for my Mom.I thanked her for all those times she took me outside just because I wanted to go. I had since learned, she most certainly would rather have lounged on the couch with a cup of coffee had it been up to her.When she would pick my sister and I up from elementary school, she would often bring Ritz Crackers with peanut butter on them as a snack for the ride home.Family vacations were centered around us. Mom used to say, "On this trip, we want everyone to have their "10". She took such interest in what each of us wanted to do most and she and Daddy made a point to incorporate those things in our time away.I remember we were all five playing a game of Pig. We usually played in order of youngest to oldest or the opposite, which meant I was always in the middle. During this particular game, she looked at me and said, "Why don't you go first this time." It sounds silly but the fact that that moment is permanently etched in my brain, tells you just how significant it was for this middle child. Mom is someone who doesn't know what it means to quit. She's a competitor: A high school basketball star and a state champion tennis player.   She is no stranger to difficulty. When talking about her childhood, the word happy doesn't come up much.   She gave her heart and soul, sometimes through blood, sweat, and tears, to us. Still does. Her dedication in teaching ALL of us for eight years astounds me. It astounds me because I know some days it took every single bit of strength she could muster just to get through that particular day.  I remember one time, and I share this only because I now KNOW exactly why this happened and have felt the exact same thing, we were having a really tough day on the home front for whatever reason.  Daddy had come home to help us work through things. She pulled a pencil out of her bun and flung it across the room as she desperately cried, "Buddy, I just can't do this!" Daddy, true to form, calmly responded, "It's going to be alright." And it was. Not only because he believed it would, but because she never left the trenches. She gave every bit of herself to us. Every day. Nearly every morning when I would get out of bed, the very first place I went was to find Mama. I knew right where to look. She was in her favorite room in the house. Our quiet living room that was separate from the loud part of the house. There she would be, Bible in her lap, a pencil behind her ear, and more often than not, the evidence of recent tears on her face. She has a rock solid foundation. She knows the truth and refuses to let go of it. Until a couple years ago every Christmas, she wore a floor length black and red plaid wool skirt. I will always associate Christmas with that kilt like skirt. I loved it. She's passed it on to Abby to continue the tradition because she says it's too tight now.  I bet it shrunk.   Mom and Dad met on a blind date. A Providential setup.    Words I associate with Mama: laughter singing long brown hair comfort good food tan skin maple candy a crooked tooth prayer warrior flowers ~she loves spring history ~she loves that too truth. I love you. ~Stacey

~can't make them happy~

I can't make my kids happy.

Let me say that again.

I....nor you.... can make your kids happy.

I could when they were 3.

Then, all they wanted was me, some bubbles, a trip to the park, and a popsicle.

Now, though.

Dude.

I'm at the very beginning of that next phase.

It's the one you hear about but can't possibly prepare for.

It's complex and emotional.

It's a little scary because......
IT'S TOTALLY OUT OF MY CONTROL.

You see, these same sweet kids who used to be okay just because you told them it was in fact, okay,
now are not so gullible or simplistic.

They no longer take your word for it that there is no boogy man.

Because I can't lie to them and tell them, nothing bad will happen, tornado sirens bring anxiety that I can only partially relieve.

They now have real choices that bring real consequences.

They now know what "popular" is and they know when they don't qualify.

They know when they are left out of something.

They don't really want to do the things I, as a parent, have told them they must do. It's especially hard to pass your friends all on bikes, cruising the neighborhood, while you are being held prisoner in your Mom's suburban, on your way to the death sentence of cutting the grass. All while, these same friends didn't even ask you to come cruising with them. Double whammy.


Here's the deal.

Suffering and difficulty are facts of life.

Pain is a guarantee.

It's just a matter of in what form and how severe you get it.

For a momma, is there anything worse than seeing your kids unhappy  in whatever way, big or small?

Whether your child or children......
have a chronic illness,
have a terminal illness,
have a disability,
are in a terrible accident,
rebel,
get pregnant before they should,
smoke whatever kids smoke now,
sneak out at night,
feel rejected,
embarrass you,
make bad grades,
don't "fit in",
aren't athletic enough,
don't have enough friends,
can't find a job,
are not the teacher's pet,
or fill in your blank.......

It simply won't always be pretty.

I CAN'T make them turn out right.
I CAN show them the right path.
I CAN teach them that they'll never find happiness as long as they are looking for things or people to bring it.
I CAN tell them where their value comes from.
I CAN'T force them to accept truth.
I CAN pray for them.
I CAN love them through everything.
And I can most definitely rest in the knowledge that the God I serve is faithful to complete the good work He begins.
I can know beyond a shadow of a doubt that though I won't understand everything that happens, I trust His will and purposes.....even when I don't like my circumstances.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Our day......in pictures.
It was a beautiful one.

~me and him~

This is a coconut.

 She fell in.

...and was NOT happy about it.

 ...until we told her it was like going swimming.

We left the woods and went to the more refined.....

here's to life.
the good and the bad.
the easy and the hard.
let's value life because it's life.
and because His ways are not our ways.

~stacey