In order for me to write anything longer than about 70 words, I have to BE quiet and I have to HAVE quiet. Things usually ruminate in my heart and mind for a few days before they find their way to the surface. Here I find myself with about 45 minutes of quiet and a few days post rumination. I'm flying as fast as my fingers will type, to get all this out in moderate confidence that one person may take comfort in it.
Listen to me. If you are, oh lets say, age 15 to 20+ and find yourself single or single-ish (yes, I know about how this season works) please let me say this to you. Hear this in the most loving, bossy, confident, comforting, pleading, Momma voice you can conjure up.
(I'm about to help you out a LOT)
I have been an older teen/young adult before.
I remember WELL wanting more than life to have
"my person"
to "be somebody's"
to be someone's #1
to be picked
to be chosen above everyone else
to always have someone saving me a seat, better yet, picking me up
to have a comfortable partner that I was proud of for every awkward dance, party, or wedding.
It's a big deal and a hard wired desire for most hearts.
If I could take your face in my hands, I would most definitely tear up as I said to you:
I know.
I really KNOW. I remember well.
I know the questions of if, when, who, and how, will I ever find someone who chooses me, are questions heavy enough to suffocate your every breath.
Without a doubt, you will BE PASSED OVER AND WILL PASS OVER more than one person along this road. That guy that you just thought was so cute and funny may pick someone else. That beautiful girl that has you mesmerized may not even know you're alive.
t.h.a.t.i.s.o.k.a.y
It's really okay.
This doesn't mean you are less than or that you are unlovely.
Rejection in this sense simply means, wrong person or wrong time....and trust me, you don't want either. <---gag...you DON'T WANT EITHER.
Hear me when I say that the God who authored your very existence is so very able and willing to take care of this part of your life. These tender bits, the deep longings of your most secret heart, He knows it all. He sees your desires, He hears your tears, and is near to every part of you.
My question for you is this:
Do you trust Him to handle this part of your life?
Do you know the Lord enough to KNOW that He has this part covered?
I've said it a hundred times...if God cannot meet your relationship needs, then what CAN He do?
He has His hand all over the details of your life.
I challenge you to resist the urge to strive, stress, and try harder.
Instead, rest. Wait. Love. Live.
Know that you are enough. Just as you are, you are enough. The God of the universe made you and has given you the stamp of approval.
Be patient.
Be fully who you are made to be.
Be kind.
Don't worry about making sure you're seen or noticed.
Be willing to wait and not always get what you think you want.
Instead, trust God to give you the desires of your heart in His timing.
You know the old adage, "good things come to those who wait"? ..something about that rings true.
(disclaimer...good does NOT mean perfect) <---BIG differnce
You are not a princess, and he is not a prince but that idea is over rated any way.
Real, nitty gritty life is where it's at.
I will never forget being in the hospital after having delivered Emma. I was in rough shape and Brad had to help me in ways I won't even mention. But somewhere in the process, I got so tickled, as he was helping me hobble to the bathroom because I was so pathetically helpless. I looked at my younger sister who was in the corner cuddling my newborn baby, and I said, "Abby. Whatever you do, get you a man who will help you roll your IV pole so you don't fall dragging your numb leg just trying to get to the bathroom."
Real love shows up in the most unexpected ways and places.
Your road will not be perfect or always easy. You may question a whole lot of things along the way, but I am confident of this: If you can learn that God is your source, that only He satisfies, that He loves you and puts desires in your heart for a reason, and that He is near to you every step, then I will be so bold as to say that His faithfulness will not disappoint you.
Trust Him and WAIT.
He's got it.
Commit every step to Him and get busy living and loving the people He puts in your path.
~stacey
Tuesday, July 14, 2020
Saturday, April 25, 2020
Quarantine Quandaries
I have little hope that I will ever let this blogpost see the light of day. But if, by some chance it makes it to your screen, just know in advance that it is likely to be unorganized, unimportant, random, and weird. It will be nothing more than a brain dump. All the thoughts I've thought, put to paper. Well, not ALL my thoughts, because NOBODY wants to hear all that.
1. What is this Quarantine madness?! My mother-in-law used to say, "You can stand on your head for two weeks"....and I whole-heartedly agree. Give me a hard thing, accompanied with an end date, and I'll plow...or at least muddle my way through. Onward, we go...suffering in silence, because that's what I do. But this....this week six, going on seven nonsense, is enough already.stop.it.
2. The height of the Wall family "Quarantine Creativity" has been nothing more than chalk drawing on the driveway, puzzle-putting-together, random leg painting, and.....let me see.....yep, nope, that's about it. We've spent every day and night in this house, (thankful to have a few rooms to choose from) we've gone on lots of walks, hit a volleyball around together, watched some movies, slept in later than usual, and cooked a LOT more (not my favorite past time). Brad has still been seeing patients...thankful he's stayed well.
Its been a one day at a time season in the Wall house. I would say that every day, at least one of us has an "is this really happening" sort of moment. There have been some tears, but also some laughter, some loneliness but also some bonding, and some "slowly slipping into madness" and a feeling of "I could claw out my insides" (as my friend described it).
So I'm just here to say, that if you've been barely getting by, it's really okay. Maybe that means you're knocking on the door of brokenness and that is a good place to be.
If you've been in perpetual "survival mode", I get it.
If you've lost it a time or two with your squirrelly toddlers, who have been climbing the walls AND your nerves, I'm willing to bet that you haven't scarred them for life.
If your mess is not a cute, staged Instagram mess, but a real life, ugly mess, yep.
I hope you've hugged more and laughed here and there.
I hope God has shown up in your living room...the grace of God never ceases to amaze me. Its there and its plentiful.
Learning to accept the uncontrollable events that God allows...
I just can't help but think there are heart things to be learned in this stillness...
Accepting.
Bowing your knee to it.
Submitting to Him in it.
Leaning in to it.
Not resisting,
not running from or hiding from,
not seeking out constant distractions, or doing everything possible to ignore,
but instead,
accepting with contentment, what is.
having a posture of humility,
of being quiet, teachable, of listening....no matter what your losing or grieving.
Patient endurance.
Quiet contentment.
Consider "everything a loss because of the surpassing value of knowing Christ Jesus..." Phil 3
Anyway....truth is truth, no matter how uncomfortable.
...and also, learning to cope with things being less than awesome, gaining the ability to accept the flat parts of life is a pretty important life skill our kids are going to need. and this is good practice.
rant over.
3. WE'VE SAT IN BEACH CHAIRS IN OUR DRIVEWAY LIKE ITS OUR JOB. It's oddly relaxing. I've been so thankful for the multiple days of glorious weather. small mercies.
4. One of my favorite moments in the last few weeks, was when my Jake walked through the kitchen, paused and said, "Hey mom. You know how everyone is talking about how bad this is for us seniors? And how we are losing so much? I mean, I don't like this, I'd rather be at school with my friends, but I just heard a guy talking about how guys my age, back in World War I and II were oversees, in trenches, fighting a war. I'd much rather be here in my home, with my family. This isn't perfect, but I sure am thankful."
5. I wonder if a thing, an event, if you will, could never be posted on the internet, if no one would every know you did it, would you do it?
I think its a good question...may be an offensive suggestion. But its something I ask myself this from time to time. Its not meant to make you paranoid (but by God's mercy, we all are ill-intentioned, and we don't want to be navel gazers and overly introspective) BUT, its a great litmus test for why we do what we do...and something to teach our daughters. Question the motive and intentions of your actions. Questions prick your conscience, and a sensitive conscience keeps you honest and humble.
6. Our poor governor. I mean, the man is, I'm sure, not trying to kill Georgians. Whether or not you agree with his decisions, what happened to kindness? Since when is it okay to rip into a person, big or small, on social media? Maybe we don't have to share online, every single opinion we have, maybe. Sometimes, quiet is good.
7. I put on my jeans every 4 or 5 days just to make sure things are still good (or at least decent) in that department.
8. I really hate plexiglass between me and my sweet Publix check out ladies.
9. I wish I had bought stock in sidewalk chalk before all this.
10. Brad woke me up this morning. He taps me and says, "Hey. Get up and come have coffee. And I made you an omelet."
Me, because my eyes were literally stuck shut, I muttered,
"What time is it?"
he says, "after 7."
Because I know this sneaky trick, I repeat,
"What time is it?"
"7:15", he says. (it was really 7:13 which hardly counts as being after 7 but nonetheless I got up)
It was a good omelet and coffee.
Hang tough, friends.
~stacey
1. What is this Quarantine madness?! My mother-in-law used to say, "You can stand on your head for two weeks"....and I whole-heartedly agree. Give me a hard thing, accompanied with an end date, and I'll plow...or at least muddle my way through. Onward, we go...suffering in silence, because that's what I do. But this....this week six, going on seven nonsense, is enough already.stop.it.
2. The height of the Wall family "Quarantine Creativity" has been nothing more than chalk drawing on the driveway, puzzle-putting-together, random leg painting, and.....let me see.....yep, nope, that's about it. We've spent every day and night in this house, (thankful to have a few rooms to choose from) we've gone on lots of walks, hit a volleyball around together, watched some movies, slept in later than usual, and cooked a LOT more (not my favorite past time). Brad has still been seeing patients...thankful he's stayed well.
Its been a one day at a time season in the Wall house. I would say that every day, at least one of us has an "is this really happening" sort of moment. There have been some tears, but also some laughter, some loneliness but also some bonding, and some "slowly slipping into madness" and a feeling of "I could claw out my insides" (as my friend described it).
So I'm just here to say, that if you've been barely getting by, it's really okay. Maybe that means you're knocking on the door of brokenness and that is a good place to be.
If you've been in perpetual "survival mode", I get it.
If you've lost it a time or two with your squirrelly toddlers, who have been climbing the walls AND your nerves, I'm willing to bet that you haven't scarred them for life.
If your mess is not a cute, staged Instagram mess, but a real life, ugly mess, yep.
I hope you've hugged more and laughed here and there.
I hope God has shown up in your living room...the grace of God never ceases to amaze me. Its there and its plentiful.
Learning to accept the uncontrollable events that God allows...
I just can't help but think there are heart things to be learned in this stillness...
Accepting.
Bowing your knee to it.
Submitting to Him in it.
Leaning in to it.
Not resisting,
not running from or hiding from,
not seeking out constant distractions, or doing everything possible to ignore,
but instead,
accepting with contentment, what is.
having a posture of humility,
of being quiet, teachable, of listening....no matter what your losing or grieving.
Patient endurance.
Quiet contentment.
Consider "everything a loss because of the surpassing value of knowing Christ Jesus..." Phil 3
Anyway....truth is truth, no matter how uncomfortable.
...and also, learning to cope with things being less than awesome, gaining the ability to accept the flat parts of life is a pretty important life skill our kids are going to need. and this is good practice.
rant over.
3. WE'VE SAT IN BEACH CHAIRS IN OUR DRIVEWAY LIKE ITS OUR JOB. It's oddly relaxing. I've been so thankful for the multiple days of glorious weather. small mercies.
4. One of my favorite moments in the last few weeks, was when my Jake walked through the kitchen, paused and said, "Hey mom. You know how everyone is talking about how bad this is for us seniors? And how we are losing so much? I mean, I don't like this, I'd rather be at school with my friends, but I just heard a guy talking about how guys my age, back in World War I and II were oversees, in trenches, fighting a war. I'd much rather be here in my home, with my family. This isn't perfect, but I sure am thankful."
5. I wonder if a thing, an event, if you will, could never be posted on the internet, if no one would every know you did it, would you do it?
I think its a good question...may be an offensive suggestion. But its something I ask myself this from time to time. Its not meant to make you paranoid (but by God's mercy, we all are ill-intentioned, and we don't want to be navel gazers and overly introspective) BUT, its a great litmus test for why we do what we do...and something to teach our daughters. Question the motive and intentions of your actions. Questions prick your conscience, and a sensitive conscience keeps you honest and humble.
6. Our poor governor. I mean, the man is, I'm sure, not trying to kill Georgians. Whether or not you agree with his decisions, what happened to kindness? Since when is it okay to rip into a person, big or small, on social media? Maybe we don't have to share online, every single opinion we have, maybe. Sometimes, quiet is good.
7. I put on my jeans every 4 or 5 days just to make sure things are still good (or at least decent) in that department.
8. I really hate plexiglass between me and my sweet Publix check out ladies.
9. I wish I had bought stock in sidewalk chalk before all this.
10. Brad woke me up this morning. He taps me and says, "Hey. Get up and come have coffee. And I made you an omelet."
Me, because my eyes were literally stuck shut, I muttered,
"What time is it?"
he says, "after 7."
Because I know this sneaky trick, I repeat,
"What time is it?"
"7:15", he says. (it was really 7:13 which hardly counts as being after 7 but nonetheless I got up)
It was a good omelet and coffee.
Hang tough, friends.
~stacey
Tuesday, March 17, 2020
Tell Them the Truth, They Can Handle It
Just a quick word.
In this unplanned, un-welcomed, extended season of a lot of unknown, I just want to say, don't miss the opportunity. Its a really great one...one that has the potential for eternal impact.
Don't miss the opportunity in your own home to live out your faith before you kids.
So few of us ever even get the chance to really trust God.
We are Americans. We fix things. We invent things. We have awesome doctors. Our hospitals are clean and state of the art. We can make (or print-ha!) more money. We have credit cards. We buy insurance. We have guns. We have cameras on our doorbells, for heaven's sake.
You see, when a thing rolls in...a thing that is bigger than us, and seems undeterred by our defiance and our unwillingness to accept it, we have a chance to remember, talk about, and demonstrate that our hope is in the Lord.
Like, we REALLY, LITERALLY are trusting in the Lord.
Yesterday, for the first time, Emma cried about all this Corona virus, social distancing, and home school stuff that is ironically accompanied by seemingly eternal, literal clouds and rain.
The kids and I were on the tennis courts, and out of nowhere, fear hit her precious heart and rolled down her sweet little cheeks.
I scooped her up and reassured her once again, that God has us in the palm of His hand.
If you are a Believer, BE a Believer today, and tomorrow.
In the grocery store, in your work place, and for goodness sake, in your home.
Of course, there is a basic, elemental, human need for security our kids have and are supposed to have. They're children...it isn't their job to worry about provision.
So speak to that.
Tell them, "Hey! We are good! We've got food, we have some medicine, and this will all get better in no time."
But more than that, there is a much deeper need for us humans to understand that there is a Being, bigger than anything on earth, bigger than what I can see or imagine that I am trusting in.
One who promises to meet my needs.
tell your kids WHY we are good.
We are good because God has His hand in and on our lives.
that nothing happens without His knowledge and allowance
that we serve the same God who split the sea to give His children a way out of certain death.
(That's not a made up story.)
The God who did that, who also provided manna every single day when there was no Publix freezer section, is the same God we serve today.
We serve a God who takes hard things and makes them and uses them for our good!
And in a little different vein:
All these things that we do, that we think we just have to have, we actually don't.
Let that settle in your mind and take the time to accept it.
Of course, I want to have my selection of beef, chicken, AND pork.
of course, I want prom to happen.
yes, for the love, I WANT my son's graduation ceremony to take place.
and yes, I wish we could watch March Madness.
But again, don't miss the opportunity to do a little to combat our American idea of comfort and convenience, fun and frills.
Our kids (and we) need to have our faith, trust, hope, and JOY in the eternal.
That's really possible, you know.
We actually can live in a way that we celebrate life because God is the giver of it and He promises eternity beyond what we see.
That is mind-blowingly exciting.
Let's be real Christians today. Lets actually invest in eternity and not fleeting, temporal nonsense. Let's speak and live in complete trust and abandonment to God's way and working.
Surrender to Him.
He is God, and we are not.
He is GOOD.
He is worthy of our trust, even when the wheels fall off.
Tell your kids the truth. They can handle it.
~stacey
In this unplanned, un-welcomed, extended season of a lot of unknown, I just want to say, don't miss the opportunity. Its a really great one...one that has the potential for eternal impact.
Don't miss the opportunity in your own home to live out your faith before you kids.
So few of us ever even get the chance to really trust God.
We are Americans. We fix things. We invent things. We have awesome doctors. Our hospitals are clean and state of the art. We can make (or print-ha!) more money. We have credit cards. We buy insurance. We have guns. We have cameras on our doorbells, for heaven's sake.
You see, when a thing rolls in...a thing that is bigger than us, and seems undeterred by our defiance and our unwillingness to accept it, we have a chance to remember, talk about, and demonstrate that our hope is in the Lord.
Like, we REALLY, LITERALLY are trusting in the Lord.
Yesterday, for the first time, Emma cried about all this Corona virus, social distancing, and home school stuff that is ironically accompanied by seemingly eternal, literal clouds and rain.
The kids and I were on the tennis courts, and out of nowhere, fear hit her precious heart and rolled down her sweet little cheeks.
I scooped her up and reassured her once again, that God has us in the palm of His hand.
If you are a Believer, BE a Believer today, and tomorrow.
In the grocery store, in your work place, and for goodness sake, in your home.
Of course, there is a basic, elemental, human need for security our kids have and are supposed to have. They're children...it isn't their job to worry about provision.
So speak to that.
Tell them, "Hey! We are good! We've got food, we have some medicine, and this will all get better in no time."
But more than that, there is a much deeper need for us humans to understand that there is a Being, bigger than anything on earth, bigger than what I can see or imagine that I am trusting in.
One who promises to meet my needs.
tell your kids WHY we are good.
We are good because God has His hand in and on our lives.
that nothing happens without His knowledge and allowance
that we serve the same God who split the sea to give His children a way out of certain death.
(That's not a made up story.)
The God who did that, who also provided manna every single day when there was no Publix freezer section, is the same God we serve today.
We serve a God who takes hard things and makes them and uses them for our good!
And in a little different vein:
All these things that we do, that we think we just have to have, we actually don't.
Let that settle in your mind and take the time to accept it.
Of course, I want to have my selection of beef, chicken, AND pork.
of course, I want prom to happen.
yes, for the love, I WANT my son's graduation ceremony to take place.
and yes, I wish we could watch March Madness.
But again, don't miss the opportunity to do a little to combat our American idea of comfort and convenience, fun and frills.
Our kids (and we) need to have our faith, trust, hope, and JOY in the eternal.
That's really possible, you know.
We actually can live in a way that we celebrate life because God is the giver of it and He promises eternity beyond what we see.
That is mind-blowingly exciting.
Let's be real Christians today. Lets actually invest in eternity and not fleeting, temporal nonsense. Let's speak and live in complete trust and abandonment to God's way and working.
Surrender to Him.
He is God, and we are not.
He is GOOD.
He is worthy of our trust, even when the wheels fall off.
Tell your kids the truth. They can handle it.
~stacey
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